| Drinking, Gambling, and Golf | 
 | A man was walking in the city, when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking bum who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner. 
 The man took out his wallet, extracted two dollars and asked, "If I gave you this money, will you take it and buy whiskey?"
 
 "No, I stopped drinking years ago," the bum said.
 
 "Will you use it to gamble?"
 
 "I don't gamble. I need everything I can get just to stay alive."
 
 "Will you spend the money on greens fees at a golf course?"
 
 "Are you NUTS! I haven't played golf in 20 years!"
 
 The man said, "Well, I'm not going to give you two dollars.
 
 Instead, I'm going to take you to my home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
 
 The bum was astounded.
 
 "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty bad."
 
 The man replied, "That's OK. I just want her to see what a man looks like who's given up drinking, gambling, and golf."
 
   
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